Why are we afraid to freak our truth? To be seen? To follow through on our creative impulse? There is some genius badassery waiting to be birthed, but…

Why does it scare us so?

The women I play with have some common fears…

• I’m afraid I’m a fraud
• Perfection keeps me spinning and stuck
• I’m not good enough
• And OPP (other peeps persuasion- which includes friends/strangers/community opinions, projected opinions, and unwanted opinions)

I have so been there. I am a former perfectionist, fraud-fearing, not-good-enough-good-girl.

But if we take a deeper look, what’s underneath these thoughts that keep us stuck?

It is the fact that we base our validation on an outside source. Booyah, baby!

If you like me, then I am worthy. If you hate me, then I’m not worthy. When we base our esteem, our happiness, our freedom on OUTSIDE experiences, we will constantly be on the rollercoaster of worthy/unworthy, happy/sad, good enough/not. For me, growing my artist self and my biz badass has been a spiritual journey. It is a journey of building my own esteem and getting so centered in Truth that I am free to express myself fully.

Truth with a cap T is:

• Knowing my spirit is here to express
• Knowing I am meant to be loved
• Knowing that joy is my birthright
• Knowing and thinking are different things. Knowing allows you to move through the rad ride of life and accept, surrender, allow it all without being a slave to circumstances.

So how to get there?

I don’t have all the answers, but I do have some invitations…

Build your esteem by imagining yourself as bright and shiny and lovable and successful. Imagine how you look through the eyes of someone that LOVES you. Maybe a child or a fave pet or a dear friend. How do they see you? Use this as guide to see yourself in the most beautiful way.

Ask your spirit to write you a love letter naming all the things that are stupendous and special about you.
Ask yourself what you really believe – do you really believe that your worth is based on other people’s opinions? Like—really??? It may sound silly when you put it to yourself that way, but when you get real with yourself; you can see what your beliefs actually are. And if you don’t like them, you can explore them and ultimately change them. For instance, when you ask yourself the question above… do I believe that my worth is based on other people’s opinions? You might be surprised by the answer. Maybe you just don’t like the sting of getting hurt or rejected (who does?) But maybe that’s all it is. That can free you up to go—Ok, I don’t like the sting of being hurt, but I’m willing to put myself out there because I actually can handle a little sting. Or maybe, you realize that people’s opinions really matter to you. A lot.

So then you get to explore that with some journaling…

Where did that belief come from?
How does it serve me?
Do I want to create a different belief?

**And if the answer is YES, start imagining yourself through the eyes of love. And keep doing it until something clicks. Consistency catapults. Inconsistency interrupts improvement.

Being visible, being seen, being fully expressed is a spiritual journey. We can take all the biz classes out there but if we don’t cultivate our own esteem… we will never give ourselves permission to fully blossom.
Is there a creative impulse—a project, an outfit, a haircut or color that you have kiboshed cuz of OPP (other peeps persuasion).

Screw that! And claim your badassery below….

September 2013 Issue