Some things you just notice when you’re growing up.

I happened to notice a lot of things when I was at mass.

My mum would take me every Sunday and I really only went to please her and once I got interested in boys, well that made Mass way more interesting.

What I really noticed at mass was how much more engaged and relaxed everyone became after they shook hands with each other.

“Peace be with you” The priest would say.

“And also with you Father”

“You may now give each other the sign of peace”

Once we did that it was like “phew”, like the whole room just relaxed, the self-consciousness dropped.

I’ve seen in myself just how self-conscious I am and most of us are when we’re in a room full of new people or any new situation.

Just this weekend I saw it in myself as I entered a room of 76 people.

And these were my people, spiritual seekers, conscious, coaches and friendly Americans.

Even so this self-consciousness, rooted deeply in the self with a small “s” , has the power to convince me at times that others will either be judging, criticising or thinking negatively about me on first glance.

It leaves me kind of frozen and I’m supposed to be “the confident one”.

What I’m seeing now though is that none of any of my experience is to do with the room, the people in it or the newness of an experience.

It’s to do with my thoughts.

Thoughts about my small self.

Thoughts about other people’s thoughts about my small self.

And the moment I connect with another, be it through the sign of peace at mass, hearing another’s story or coaching a client who’s facing fears, guess what happens?

My small self disappears.

I’m reconnected again.

Back to Grace, literally.

Performance gets easier, navigating new situations more enjoyable, deep connection is formed and self-consciousness gone.

And that’s the nature of thought, it seems to me to have the power to hold you prisoner in a room of people or…

Free in a world of opportunity where at our core we’re all OK, because guess what?

It’s only thought.

We’d love to hear from YOU…

Where in your life do you feel self-conscious? What thoughts make you feel that way? Leave your answer in the comments below! 

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business owner, entrepreneur, February 2016 Issue, networking, online business, peace, women in business