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Whether you have a green thumb or not, it’s time to put on those tacky gardening gloves and start getting rid of those weeds in your life. If you’ve ever had any experience with gardening, not to say that I have, but word on the block is that eradicating those weeds can get messy. The task at hand is tedious and challenging to say the least, but rest assured, the result is a perfectly manicured lawn where the grass will certainly seem greener on your side.

Let’s move on from the proverbial talk, shall we? The weeds that I’m referring to are the people and environments that play the role of weeds who compete with resourceful and beautiful plants for sunlight and other nutrients, and win. Thus, leaving your life, like your garden, much bleaker, unhealthy, and down right exhausted.

Now, identifying these “weeds” in your life can be a little tricky. Some varieties are incredibly invasive and easy to spot. We all know this kind and can for the most part eliminate them quickly. Others linger quietly and are difficult to uncover and identify as destructive and useless. The latter is what we should keep our eyes open for, the ones that require some effort and may be disguised as prized roses but are certainly not. These weeds are probably destructive because of their own struggles with what they lack, but that is not our concern and should never be a reason to let them continue to poison our growth and keep us from thriving.

Whether you are in a work environment, in a relationship, or holding on to childhood friendships that no longer seem to be as fruitful as they used to be, it’s important to look for the individuals and settings that leave you feeling as if the life has been sucked out of you. I’m sure you have all experienced these uninspiring encounters that just magically seem to give rise to all things ugly and bring up insecurities that touch on the specific things you may be lacking. If you’ve ever had to leave work feeling emotionally drained, or a lunch date that somehow left you feeling blue, keep an eye out for those weeds. The “ugly” was not magically, but strategically, brought up to make you feel exactly as crummy (to avoid a more inappropriate word) as you do.

It is also not a coincidence that these individuals seem to infiltrate right when you are enjoying a recent success or a great thing that is blooming in your life. If you understand anything about human nature, you will know that your happiness and success can be dangerously threatening for individuals that are not quite content, or as I like to call them; weeds.

Since many of these individuals are artfully condescending and sly about their calculated damage, freeing yourself of them can often be difficult. My only advice to you is to put on your big girl pants, and just do it. Hold your breath, know what’s good for you, and slowly but surely distance yourself from these people and environments that do nothing but leave you with a yellow and malnourished garden. If it’s your job, move on. If it’s a significant other, again, protect yourself and move on. If friends are poisoning your growth, then you may need to reevaluate what you call them…and move on. Gravitate towards happy, blooming, and confident individuals who think their grass is already green enough. These people will give you gardening advice while they help you spot those poisonous weeds. I know I’m still working on getting rid of all the weeds, but let me tell you, my garden has never looked better.

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October 2013 Issue