Sacred Sassy Heroine: This is the every day goddess within each woman. It is she who harnesses the unfeigned feminine energy that makes you divine. She embraces all-she-is and struts it like she means it. Tonight is the full moon. This cosmic event serves as a reminder to crack out of your proper exoskeleton and reconnect with the howling sister within. She is sacred. She is sassy. She is YOU. And she is a Heroine.

While everyone else was busy climbing the cosmic ladder of their dreams, my rungs seemed to be rotten and kept breaking. (I never showed my skinned up knees in any of my bio pics – head shots only!)

Still I persevered! When I did finally experience sweet moments of succulent success, I didn’t feel like Katy Perry singing “Roar.”

Instead I would shudder, tail between my legs. Emotionally I was a sea anemone, closed up safe and tight. The key word there is safe.

Believe it or not, I’m not alone, for many of us it’s actually easier to be seen in our pain and failure than it is to be seen in our radiance and success. Why the hell is that??

Let me give 3 reasons for starters…

1.)  Broken contracts

You have contracts with friends, family, peers and colleagues. These unspoken mainly unconscious contracts clearly state that you promise to play small.  You will not be amazing, larger than life, or freakin fabulous in any way shape or form.

Uhoh! Now you’ve done it, deal breaker! No one will love you anymore….

Or so that’s the BS story spinning in your head.

2.)  Sustainability

Well crap, now you found out your peeps still love you, and further more they’re cheering you on! What could possibly be left to freak out about?

“OMG, now they’re going to expect me to be extraordinary ALL the time. What have I gotten myself into?”

How will you sustain this new level of stupendous?

“This was just a chance incident. I’m more likely to be struck by lightening than to ever duplicate these kind of results!”

3.)  Self Worth

Reaching that big goal calls down to the dark and murky cellars of your self-doubt with a big, “neener neener, told ya I could do it!”

The waking dragons that fly out of those shadow places carry with them the withered shreds of your self worth or lack thereof. You stand aghast peering into the vestiges of your humiliated still small scaredy cat self.

All 3 of these reasons are valid and nearly inevitable. Here’s where I might piss you off a little. *grimace*

I have no antidote for the process of expansion. It hurts like a bitch a lot of the time. Think of it like childbirth. There will be contractions – just breathe.

I hear you muttering under your breath wondering why I’m even bothering to talk about it if there’s no epidural.

I’ll tell you why. When you know you’re not the only one, when you know this is just part of the creative growth process, when you get that your mentors and role models have also survived these growing pains (and if they are alive and still amazing, they’re are still going through them.) then you can let yourself off the hook a little. You can check yourself before you wreck yourself.

You can continue to blossom and eventually blow ‘em outa the water sister!

I’m not the only one. You’re not the only one. Here’s a permission slip to cry those tears, pull the blanket over your head, sit in the discomfort of your own greatness for a minute, then lift your head high, wipe off the snot, look yourself in the eye cuz you’re doing it baby, “…doing it and doing it and doing it well!”

February 2014 Issue