Writing Through Anxiety

Most of my clients find me at the very beginning stages of their writing process. In fact, most have never written a book before and have a lot of fears and doubts about themselves and their abilities. They think I can help them find the answers. And, I’ve discovered, that they have a fundamental, underlying, often unspoken belief, that somehow I have moved past fear, anxiety or doubt as an author and am therefore capable of something they’re not.

I wish!

In fact, my heart is racing right now. Truth is, I’ve experienced intense anxiety while writing for several years now. Not all the time. I can often go months without it. But when it’s here, it’s definitely here! Last Spring, I recall having one anxiety attack that lasted 10 hours – and having to write a full chapter for my master’s thesis during it.

While not everyone experiences full anxiety attacks, fears and doubts are normal and slow all of us down at some point or another with thoughts like: “You’re no good. You never were. What are you thinking?” Something I’ve honestly never been told when it comes to my writing, and yet, that voice is the loudest when the anxiety hits. Go figure.

There’s also: “I have nothing new to say. It’s already been said by others so what’s the point?” That’s a common one for many, many authors – no matter how new or seasoned they are.

Or there’s this: “What if no one reads it?” If it’s published somewhere, it’ll get read. Maybe not by as many as you want if you haven’t built your audience up yet, but it will get read. And yet, it’s a common stumbling block.

My personal favorite from my first-time author clients though is: “I’m not a very good writer.” Truth is, I haven’t met one person yet who actually lived up to that belief. It usually comes out of a fear of the red pen drilled into us by well-meaning English teachers. Besides, there are content development editors and line editors to resolve the grammatical issue for you. All you really need is your passion, purpose and message to share.

So how do you, I, we move through our anxiety, fears and doubts to get our message out? We decide to. Sure, I write faster when I feel calm and confident, but I can still write even when I’m anxious. It takes a lot more focus. It also takes a lot more trust too. But mostly, it takes a decision to stop listening to all those voices.

The real truth is that while I feel and experience every one of those fears and doubts right along with my clients, I do have one advantage that I hope they have the courage and stamina to learn: They are all illusions. Every. Damn. One of them.

The problem is that we can only experience our fears as illusions AFTER we’ve accomplished that which made us afraid in the first place!

The biggest challenge experts face when they decide to become authors is not their ability to write, or deciding what to write about, or even the marketing end of things. It is their ability to distinguish between the illusions in their minds and the truths their hearts are trying to share.

What is your fear and how do you hold onto your heart’s truth in spite of it?